How Bullying Shaped My Life

Every October, schools and organizations across the country observe National Bullying Prevention Month. The goal is to encourage communities to work together to stop bullying and cyberbullying by increasing awareness of the prevalence and impact of bullying on children of all ages.

There is a very fine line between teasing and bullying. How do help children be aware of the difference and how it impacts those around them? Below is a story written by one of our students and submitted to the university she is taking college credit courses at explaining how bullying has shaped her life.

How Bullying Shaped My Life

Like a ferocious dog with a bone, my teacher, Snape*, yelled, “You are the most selfish person I have ever met, and you will never be happy in life!” As I burst into tears, the whole class stared in shock. I never understood why I was so different and socially awkward. I just knew I was. I ran to the dark locker room in shame, feeling like a half-eaten sandwich at the bottom of the trash can. This was just the beginning of what would be a horrific three years of middle school at Durmstrang*. Bullying affected my life, the way I treat people, and the way I view myself.

In sixth grade, the whole class went to camp for three days and little did I know that this would be the worst camping experience of my life. I was in the same cabin as the girls who would torment me, but at the time, I thought they were my friends. Every day, I would wake up and not be sure if we were really friends. This uncertainty made me feel like I did not deserve friends. Upon returning from camp I went to my room and cried. Sometimes, the girls I thought were my friends would treat me right and I would fall right back into their trap. They would come up to me and say, ” I am so glad we are friends.” “Do you want to come to my house on Friday.” I would agree only to be made fun of for the evening. One day, Malfoy* decided I was only good enough for her if I had something to offer. I usually had homemade cookies and brownies to share, but on this day, I didn’t. I was thrown aside like yesterday’s newspaper. The other girls were terrified of being targeted by her so they agreed with her and made me feel isolated and alone.

Another traumatic experience was the time I went to Goyle’s* house. We were talking and laughing. Suddenly, in the middle of a story, she said, “Hey Shirley, don’t get offended but you need to control your ADHD better.” I could not believe she would say something like that. I felt as though I wasn’t doing a good job at fitting in, even with my closest friends.

The behavior of my peers may seem hard to believe but, you haven’t heard anything yet. Imagine feeling socially awkward during conversations with friends and being turned against in a moment’s notice. This happened the first time I got my period. I was participating in track practice when all of a sudden I thought, “Oh no! I need to go to the bathroom.” I waited in the bathroom until someone came in to check on me. When someone finally came in I asked, “Hey, can you get me either a pad or tampon.?” The girl went and got me both and said, “Congratulations!” After I finished getting cleaned up, I went into the gym and Malfoy announced to the whole track team including the boys, “Shirley just got her first period!” This made me feel like a bumblebee on a cold winter night. I couldn’t understand why someone would do that.

All of this bullying made me fall into deep depression, and I frequently thought, “I want to die.” This feeling of hopelessness and despair went on for years. I remember crying to my mom about how I felt different and knew something was wrong with me. My mother would say, “Those girls don’t deserve you.” These feelings and thoughts led to many doctor’s appointments. When I was in seventh grade, I finally found the answer. I was diagnosed with Asperger’s, a form of Autism. After learning more about Asperger’s, I thought, “Finally, it makes sense. This is why I am so different.” I was angry and upset with God that he made me this way. If he loved me why couldn’t he make me normal? The icing on the cake came when my mom wanted me to go to a school for kids with disabilities. I was appalled because I wanted to be normal. We fought for a year, neither of us giving in. I continued to go to school where I was bullied and not receiving the accommodations I needed. And I was miserable! One day, I finally realized that I deserve to be happy and I had enough.

In eighth grade I started at New Horizons Academy (N.H.A.). As their mission statements say they “offer a holistic, all-encompassing educational path for kids with special needs”. The transition was rough because I didn’t keep in touch with anyone from Durmstrang. I was thrown into a new environment with no connections to my past. This journey to the unknown was very scary. With not knowing anybody at N.H.A., I felt less lonely than all my years at Durmstrang. I was with people like me, and my teachers were equipped to educate kids with disabilities.

At N.H.A., there is a no tolerance bullying policy and teachers that actually enforce it. At Durmstrang, teachers would say they would do something about it, and then nothing would ever happen. When Snape said those things to me, I told Principal Umbridge*, and he said he would take care of it. However, no action was ever taken against Snape. That made me feel like a Hawaiian pizza which is disgusting and wrong! In all seriousness, I felt like I was the one who was in trouble and that I was the one who was wrong and not the teacher who failed his job at being a positive role model. That made me feel like crap!

When I was younger, I wanted to be an actress/dolphin trainer/dress designer. I, now however, see that the correct career path for me is to be a special education teacher. I came to this realization when I was volunteering in the preschool classrooms. I chose to volunteer in those classrooms, because I have always had a passion for helping little kids. I never knew how good I was with special education kids. Unlike Snape, I am patient, kind, and understanding. For example, one day while I was volunteering in the preschool class Collin* got upset and was hitting people and throwing things. I was afraid he might hurt someone, so I took all of the kids out of the classroom and calmed them down. We played with the rubber cows, which you sit on and bounce around on. I was kind and understanding when it came to why Collin was throwing a fit, and I listened to how the kids felt. I wish that Snap had treated me with the same kindness and understanding at Durmstrang.

He may not have known it, but he left a lasting impression on me and how I treat others. I know that I never want to be like him. Some lessons you learn directly, and some lessons you learn through other people. I learned many lessons at both Durmstrang and New Horizons Academy. Some were positive, and some were negative, but both shaped me and made me who I am today. I am an advocate for those in need, and I will always try to be better than I was the day before. Bullying was and is a huge influence in how I treat people and how I view myself.

*Names have been changed to protect the identity of the guilty.

Hope in the Midst of Life ~ October 2017

“You’re Gonna Miss This”

It is so easy to get caught up in the details of the day. The hustle and bustle of “getting there” and “doing this” and “getting that done” sure makes life challenging. So when “I need this,” or “Please, can you help me?” … get thrown in, “challenging” starts to be “this might be crazy”. Those of us who help others who can’t help themselves, also know things like “I HAVE to do this for ____”, “He can’t do it, so I need to” and “Who will do this if I don’t?” – come up in our heads with so much regularity we sometimes think we can’t do it all. Life gets so busy! Just remembering to buy toothpaste, and wash enough underwear for the week become significant accomplishments! Not just getting through the week, but getting through the day, becomes the goal. And then we wake up and start over.

An article appeared in my inbox today. It listed “7 songs that are so happy you will cry” or something like that. So I pulled them up, one at a time on You Tube. I cried. I cried in gratitude for the blessings. I also cried in the grief of missing the times of those particular blessings. And I cried because even though many days I tried to pause and stop time; you know, to look around and take a deep breath and breathe in the moment to burn it forever in my memory… the sights and sounds and smells… because I knew it was all going too fast. Well I am here to tell you – that even though I did that – it went too fast. The details in my day… mostly the things I saw as problems; you know, the deadlines and lists and needs – got in my way of just being thrilled in each moment… and even thankful for the challenges.

As I write this – I am aware that this sounds cliché. We all know time goes fast and yet so many times I have let the “busy” and the “necessary” keep me distracted from the faces in front of me. But lately I see something more… I see people giving their focus to screens instead of faces. I am not saying screens are bad. They are a great way to communicate. But screen time gets in the way of real – face time.

Not to recognize the challenges, and the things that need to be done, might mean that we are not responsible. Oh but to be free enough from those lists and needs, to breathe life in and laugh with joy … and choose the fun thing on a regular basis! The dishes will still be there and somehow the underwear will get washed… Oh the delight in that! And perhaps I am alive even if I don’t read about it on Facebook. I am reminded of statistics I read recently. It turns out that life is not about the big events – the grand vacation to distant lands, and the expensive dinner out. The people who are the happiest – are focused on the little moments of each day. They don’t miss the important little things because of lists; they LIVE in each moment. What is more – they aren’t just bodily present while focused on a screen. They are focused on the real eyes and hearts right in front of them.

I know this is easier said than done… But what would your life and your family be like, if you stopped the business? What if you put your phone down and turned the TV off and you danced in the kitchen with your spouse, or your child? (In whatever way that you dance when nobody else is watching.) What if you began to sing like nobody was listening… you know, from your heart? What if you stopped long enough to listen until those you love had shared all they keep inside because nobody has had the time to hear? What if your life wasn’t about posting on a screen… but celebrating and laughing with those beside you who need not only your physical presence but your attention so desperately?

What if you could live today, right now, in a way that caused you to not only breathe life in and burn the memory into your heart forever, but let you feel the warmth of your loved ones’ presence? AND what if you could PLAY? You know – actually have FUN! Remember the last time you laughed so hard your sides ached and you nearly wet your pants?

Yes, we have to be responsible, especially if we are helping those who can’t help themselves. But what if we could focus on them and not the lists, or screens?

You might take some time to pull some songs up. Listen, and put aside the lists for a while… and then put the screen down and LIVE… because believe it not – “You are going to miss this.” Make this day the memory you want it to be.

“You’re Gonna Miss This” by Trace Adkins
“You Raise Me Up” by Josh Groban
“Live Like You Were Dying” by Tim McGraw
“Home” by Phillip Phillips
“100 Years” by Five for Fighting
“Blessed” by Martina McBride
“I Hope You Dance” by Lee Ann Womack
… and so many others.

Janet Miller MA LPCC

2017-18 NHA Yearbook Sponsorship

We are so thankful to our sponsors for making this past year’s yearbook project possible.

Our goal is to once again provide our students and their parents with this very special memento. We hope to raise funds through sponsors in order to keep the costs of the yearbooks as low as possible, so that more students and their families will be able to afford one.

We invite you to consider being a sponsor of this very special project!

We also gladly accept general donations for those not interested in being recognized as sponsors.

COST: $150.00

This level of sponsorship includes a 3.75″ x 4.25″ (approx.) color advertisement in the yearbook, recognition on our website and recognition on social media with a link to your business’ social media page or website.

COST: $90.00

This level of sponsorship includes a business card sized color advertisement in the yearbook and recognition on our website.

COST: $30.00

This level of sponsorship includes your business or name listed in the yearbook and website.

Advertisements must be received by March 1, 2017.
Ads can be emailed in .jpg/.jpeg format to jessiew@sarasgarden.org.
Ads may be dropped off at Sara’s Garden or New Horizons Academy.

Sara’s Garden is a 501(c)3 tax-exempt organization and your donation is tax-deductible within the guidelines of U.S. law. To claim a donation as a deduction on your U.S. taxes, please keep your email donation receipt as your official record. We’ll send it to you upon successful completion of your donation.

Thank You Yearbook Sponsors!

We would like to express thanks to the following sponsors for their support of our school’s 2016-2017 yearbook. This was the first year we were able to provide a yearbook for the children at New Horizons Academy and we are so thankful for this opportunity.

Please help us by supporting these amazing businesses whenever you can! Without their involvement, this amazing yearbook project would not have been possible!

Platinum Yearbook Sponsors

Grieser Transportation
Machacek Concrete LLC
Wauseon Eye Care
Wauseon Machine & Manufacturing

Gold Yearbook Sponsors

Brown Bag Market
Delta 109 Tavern & Eatery
Drs. Behringer, Herman, and Eckhardt-BHE Orthodontics
Maumee Trim & Upholstery
Scott Neuman–State Farm Insurance

PTSD Goes Far Beyond the Battlefield

When someone suffers a violent or horrifying experience, the trauma can often follow them around for years. From accident victims to soldiers, countless people have found themselves haunted by traumatic life-changing experiences. Whether one simply witnesses or is directly involved with the event, the experience can have profound psychological effects on the individual.

While car crashes, shootings, floods, fires or assaults can happen to anyone at any time, the rate of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) following a brain injury is much higher in veterans than civilians, most likely because they often serve multiple tours and encounter prolonged exposure to intense combat.

Gordon joined the Army in February 2000, serving nearly 14 years as an infantryman. During his time in the service Gordon spent 3 tours, spanning over 35 months, in Afghanistan as a Staff Sergeant 1st Class in the Third Platoon, Bravo Company, 2nd Battalion, 87th Infantry Regiment. His platoon’s missions, heroics, struggles and losses were featured in the New York Times Bestseller, Outlaw Platoon.

During one such mission, Gordon’s Humvee was hit by a rocket-propelled grenade as his platoon guarded its forward operating base. Gordon crawled into the injured gunner’s hatch, taking over the M2 .50 caliber machine gun and returned fire throughout the ensuing six-hour battle, stopping the advance of enemy forces. He was hit by shrapnel in his right arm and left foot

Because of the numerous firefights and intense explosions that Gordon experienced, he began suffering painful and concerning symptoms such as headaches, avoidance, insomnia, depression, isolation and back pain. For soldiers like Gordon, these emotional, physical and behavioral changes can begin to have devastating effects on their interpersonal life.

Ultimately, Gordon was medically retired from the Army in 2014 due to the numerous injuries he sustained overseas. He earned both a Purple Heart and a Bronze Star for his meritorious service and sacrifice. It didn’t take long to realize that transitioning back to civilian life was going to be harder than expected. Gordon, like many other soldiers returning home from service, continued to fight a battle on multiple fronts, coping with the damaging effects of the brain injuries and associated Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder he suffered from combat-related blasts. The trauma from what he had seen and experienced began to take its toll on his personal, family and work life.

If left untreated, PTSD can, and often does, spiral into other more serious problems such as panic disorders, substance abuse, depression, and suicidal feelings. Sadly, many of our veterans are not getting access to the treatments they need to heal the actual brain injury. Instead, their symptoms are simply being masked with prescription medications while the source of the problem is left untreated. The unfortunate result is that our veterans end up on countless medications for depression, anxiety, concentration, sleeplessness and pain. Treatments are available to treat the brain injury but they are not being prescribed, because they are considered “off-label” and therefore not covered by insurance in the United States.

Thankfully for Gordon, his family helped him recognize that the issues he was facing were very serious and found help for him in the form of Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy (HBOT). Gordon, while hesitant and cautious, was willing to try anything if it meant finding relief from the migraines that were consuming him. The twelve prescription medications he was taking were still ineffective in helping him escape the pain.

After beginning HBOT, Gordon was both thrilled and relieved to discover that the debilitating headaches that had controlled his life for so long were beginning to subside. He also began to see recognizable improvements in other areas of his life as well. The pain in his back began to abate and he began sleeping restfully through the night, something he had not experienced in years. By the end of his treatments, Gordon’s headaches were nearly gone. He was able to reduce the need for his prescriptions to the point where he was only taking two medications.

Before receiving HBOT, Gordon could not spend time in crowds or large groups. It was too overwhelming for him and he felt as if he were in a constant high alert state, his combat instincts lurking just below the surface. The Gordon that others had known before his time in the service, was no longer compatible with who he was now. He felt awkward around other people and was not communicative. He was depressed and preferred to be alone but didn’t know why.

HBOT changed all that. Gordon can now comfortably spend time in groups and even goes up to people to initiate conversations. His family loves that he finally has his sense of humor back. He actually laughs again. He is no longer on edge all the time, living with a heightened sense of anxiety. Afghanistan had become a dividing line in Gordon’s life. Thanks to Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy at Sara’s Garden, Gordon has been able to surge past it and rebuild much of what had been lost. He claims that he has finally been able to get his life back.

Awareness of TBI and PTSD has increased greatly in recent years. However, it seems like the more we learn about these devastating conditions, the more there is to know. Our prayer is that, in time, awareness of the positive effects HBOT can have for these warriors suffering from TBI and PTSD will increase as well, so that more of America’s heroes will have access to this life-changing treatment.

No matter what you’ve been told, there is hope… for this and many other conditions. HBOT is treatment without drugs… without surgery… without pain.

NHA Now Enrolling for 2017-18

New Horizons Academy is currently enrolling for the 2017-18 academic school year.

NHA strives to make special education just that… special. Our commitment to high academic standards, quality intervention programs and innovative therapy services allows us to provide strong academic, behavioral and physical development in a safe and welcoming environment.

At New Horizons Academy kids come first. We exist for our students; our students do not exist for the school. Students don’t have to fit into the classes; the class and program is made to meet the individual student’s needs.

We have a truly amazing staff that administers excellent academic, intervention and therapy programs at all grade levels and in all areas of the curriculum. This dedication has provided a foundation upon which our students have experienced tremendous successes that their families had been told were not possible.

This is an exceptional school environment, which has the best interests of the students at heart. The ongoing support and involvement of our staff, administration and board, is critical to the mission of the school and to the sense of family, which is so important to us. Equally important is the role of the family, whose involvement and support enriches the life of our school.

We look forward to the possibility of serving your family and the opportunity to guide and support your child’s development towards increased independence and academic success.

If you are interested in additional information regarding 2017-18 enrollment, please contact Val Nafziger at 419.335.7272 or via email at valn@sarasgarden.org.

Poker Run 2017 Reminder

This year’s poker run is just around the corner. Get ready to ride! The Morenci American Legion Riders Post #368 are hosting a poker run to benefit Sara’s Garden on Saturday, July 15, 2017. The ride will start at Sara’s Garden and end at the Morenci American Legion. Come out and spend the day on the open road with us!

Event Date:	Saturday, July 15, 2017
Event Begins:	The Hope Center at Sara’s Garden, Wauseon, Ohio
Event Ends:	American Legion Post, Morenci, Michigan
Event Time:	Check-in at 10:30 a.m. Kickstands up at 12:00 p.m.
Rider Cost:	$15 per Rider
Passenger Cost:	$10 per Passenger (OPTIONAL)

All proceeds from this event are being used to support the veteran’s service fund at Sara’s Garden. This fund provides scholarships for HBOT services to veterans returning from active service with Traumatic Brain Injuries and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Sara’s Garden is a recognized 501(c)(3) non-profit organization and is the only facility in the United States to offer Autism Intervention, Conductive Education, Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Sensory Integration and Speech-Language Pathology services.

Event Participation Includes:

Meal at the Legion following the ride.

Event Will Also Feature:

Prizes for winning hands
50/50 drawings
Silent auction

Sponsorship Opportunities:

Silent Auction Sponsor – $100

Includes silent auction sponsor signage and program recognition.

Event Sponsor – $200

Includes event sponsor signage and program recognition.

Title Sponsor – $500

Includes title sponsor signage and program recognition.

For more information regarding event sponsorship opportunities, please contact Jackie at 419.335.SARA or via email at jackier@sarasgarden.org.

Sara’s Garden is a recognized 501(c)(3) non-profit organization and is the only facility in the United States to offer Autism Intervention, Conductive Education, Hyperbaric Oxygen Therapy, Occupational Therapy, Sensory Integration and Speech-Language Pathology services.

QuarterMania 2017

Clear space on your calendar! QuarterMania 2017 is just around the corner.

On Thursday, August 3, Sara’s Garden will be hosting its third annual QuarterMania FUNdraiser. Proceeds from this full-filled event will benefit our school for children with special needs, New Horizons Academy. New Horizons Academy at Sara’s Garden provides innovative educational, intervention and therapy services to over 100 children from over 20 school districts across Northwest Ohio. There will be many area vendors to shop from. The event will feature auctions, raffles, and 50/50 drawings.

Event Date:	Thursday, August 3, 2017
Event Location:	The Hope Center at Sara’s Garden, Wauseon, Ohio
Event Time:	Doors open at 5:00, Auction starts at 6:30
Paddles:	$3 each or two for $5

What is a QuarterMania?

If you are like us when we first heard of this, you are probably wondering, “What in the world is a QuarterMania event?”

A QuarterMania is a cross between an auction and a raffle where people ‘bid’ to win a product/prize of goods donated from local businesses and various home businesses participating in the event. Bids on these new items range from 1 to 4 quarters. There are usually between 40 and 60 items to auction during a QuarterMania.

When you arrive

When you arrive at the event, you will register and pick out a paddle (or several) with a number on each that is used for your individual bidding on the items you want to try to win. Paddles are $3 each or two for $5. All proceeds from paddle sales are donated directly to Sara’s Garden. 50/50 tickets are also available at this time.

How the auction works

The auctioneer begins by holding up a product and telling a little bit about the highlights and then tells everyone how much the item is going for – between 1 and 4 quarters. If you would like to bid on that item, you put the corresponding number of quarters in the collection pot then hold up your paddle(s) and wait for your number to be called.

Once all the bids are in – the auctioneer randomly selects a number. If your lucky paddle number is called and you have placed a bid , you WIN that item! Now, if you didn’t bid – you just say “no bid” and the auctioneer will re-shuffle the numbers and continue calling a number until someone who has placed a bid and is holding their paddle up wins.

It’s that simple, and it’s a load of fun!

That’s not all!

In addition to the biddings, there are 50/50 tickets and other raffle drawings going on throughout the evening. Tickets for raffle items will be $1 each or six for $5. Also, the participating businesses have a lots of specials as well as cash & carry items at their tables. Please stop by and support these individuals as these events would not be possible without them.

Food, desserts, and beverages will be available for a free will donation.

So… if you are ready for a fun-filled evening for a GREAT CAUSE, grab your QUARTERS and SOME FRIENDS and be there!

For more information on this event either as a participant or as a vendor, please visit the Facebook event page or contact Tina Whalen via email or phone at (419) 345-5302.

Cushman Pacemaker Raffle Reminder

Don’t forget to get your tickets to our Cushman Pacemaker raffle!

This is your chance to win a piece of American history! We are going to be raffling off a brilliantly restored 1953 Cushman Pacemaker scooter.

The Cushman company started in 1903 in Lincoln, Nebraska, by Everett and Clinton Cushman. The company incorporated as Cushman Motor Works in 1913. Cushman began production of their four-stroke Husky engine in 1922. Cushman produced engines for farm equipment, pumps, lawn mowers and boats. Cushman scooters were widely used by the United States Armed Forces in World War II and as an alternative to automobiles before and after the war. Some late-1950s Cushmans, designated Road King and Pacemaker, had jet-age body styling. Cushman scooters featured an automatic centrifugal clutch, which allowed the rider to twist the right grip to accelerate. Oddly, the throttle twisted forward during acceleration, opposite the usual pattern in most other motorcycles and scooters. Cushman claimed 75 miles per gallon, and advertised penny-a-mile operating cost.

Thanks to a very thoughtful and generous donor, you now have the opportunity to win one of these amazing machines! Single tickets can be purchased for only $10. Tickets can also be purchased in bundled quantities of 10.

Hope in the Midst of Life ~ July 2017

Welcome summer! For many of us, the “weather report” is… hot and sunny with lots of busy young people at home!

I hope this finds you on-purpose, setting some time aside from business and slowing down to be together! Maybe it is a picnic, or just playing catch in the yard or going for a hike or a bike ride.

Perhaps your dream of summer is something like mine… hot, slow and maybe sometimes lazy days of little structure and lots of fun! But what I know is that many people see it differently. Instead of being thrilled to have the “problem” of what to do with the kids… it is more of “another worry”. This, added to an already full plate, can be very challenging.

When I say “worry”, it reminds me of a report I just read that says “anxiety is now the number one mental health problem instead of depression”. Anxiety is characterized by a constant and overwhelming worry and fear, and it is now 800% more prevalent than all forms of cancer. (Mercola) That’s a whole lot of worry!!

Depending what you read, you will find many things listed as the cause; from social media and pressures to succeed, eating too much sugar, dyes and chemicals, not having a healthy gut, the fact that our country has been at war for over a decade and a half, to finances, and the list goes on. So, all that said… what we know is – anxiety – I’ll call it – significant, constant, or nearly constant worry – is an issue for many many people and it is miserable. One author wrote, “Worry can be one of the most common causes of suffering in the U.S.” Isn’t that an interesting perspective?

What can we do to help ourselves and/or our children with anxiety or worry? We older adults can see that young persons today clearly face more pressure situations than we may have, and everything seems to be moving so much faster and busier. How does one cope and NOT worry or get involved in anxiety?

Let’s start by considering not watching the television news or shows where people are in danger or get hurt. Instead of TV, let’s get outside! One of the most helpful tools I have found is to do something that I enjoy so much that I “lose time” in it. What hobby do you have that you enjoy so much that time “just gets away from you”? Maybe it is working in your garden, or wood carving, or needle work, or a musical instrument. For many today it might be the popular – coloring a picture. But the very best thing I have found for me personally and for clients I have worked with … comes back to purpose. Is there something I can do that is purposeful, especially something that helps someone else? What I know is that if we are busy doing something that we find purpose in, we worry less. This is my little brain telling me – the little bit that I do, can make a difference, and therein I find hope!

How can you help yourself and your children worry less? Get them involved in making something that they enjoy. Help them find something they can do that is purposeful to help someone else, because then they are making a difference, and whether they recognize it or not – they will worry less and have more hope.

I am reading a book about the Shackleton Trans-Antarctic expedition. Their ship became frozen in the ice. This was December 5, 1914 – May 1916 and nobody knew, let alone was going to come and save them. For more than an entire year these men lived in extreme danger and bitter cold. They lived in the ship until it broke up. Then they lived on a half mile wide ice flow, until it became only 200 meters wide. When I think about being in a situation like this I feel anxious! The leader and several of the men eventually risked “the most dangerous seas in the world” in a little life boat and made it back to South Georgia Island. From there they tried three different times, in three different ships, to rescue the other men until they succeeded. I can’t imagine being that cold and that wet and in a situation that seemingly looked like there was no hope to survive, let alone for more than a year! At the same time this was happening, there was an expedition in the Arctic with similar fate, but they didn’t fare as well. The difference was the leaders. Shackleton kept his men focused; busy doing things that would help them get home. Which is like saying – he kept them purposeful and thus hopeful.

One author wrote, “Anxiety is energy without a goal.” So, with this information, give the children, and yourself, a goal to help someone. If we can find purpose, these activities that will divert our attention from our problems, and fears to knowing we have the power to make a difference, then we can cope! And if we can make a difference, maybe we don’t have to worry about everything.

Thankfully we don’t face the dangers of Antarctica, but when persons deal with anxiety, it may seem like it. If you find yourself or a loved one or friend who is suffering from ongoing worry, you might encourage them to talk with someone who is used to helping people who worry. But let me suggest to you, that you make a plan – to intentionally do some fun things with your family and enjoy as much of every moment with them that you can. It will not only build relationships, but help you cope.

Have a wonderful summer and may it be with less worry and more fun because you are working in a purpose!!

Janet Miller MA LPCC